On the way to visit a friend

Je continue à réaliserQue le monde est vraimentHostile sans aucun considération I wonder if I’ll always feel this wayPerpétuellement sous le chagrinToujours envahir par l’anxiété de vivreUnable to find those glimmers of joy C’est comme ci je peux pas malgré toutArriver à une espace sans douleurSans le deuil inattendue et incessantSans le désespoir et la…

The Joy of You

I don’t write anymore These days I spend my days forgetting Letting the pretty little words flitter Through my mind passing away Like butterflies in the cold This mind has become a grave Where I bury the little joys I once had Where I let the poems fade into nothingness Forgetting that once upon a…

Invaded

There is a stranger in my mouth an unwanted visitor who refuses to leave even though I want him to go There is a stranger in this house he keeps making me forget why he cannot stay here anymore he keeps making me forget that this house this body this mind this soul is still…

Strangers again

—and yet you still looked at me like a stranger as if all the time spent was just a dream all the years of us gone down the drain all the days of that thing we never quite said lost in your neglect

Only

he said I was the only cockroach in his cupboard I fucked him in ways he could not recover from taught him how to choke without failing gave him pieces of myself embedded in the scratches a secret message to the next one he wants to keep I carved out my name in the most…

Let go

Let go of the past Not only because it is dragging you down But also because there’s so much more to life Than broken memories and secret pains There is the joy of love And there is hope And living in the present isn’t as bad as you think It is okay to feel It…

Jemimah

I met her winter of 2013 Clueless and lonely she walked me home in the cold met mom and dad and decided it was worth giving me a shot   Every weekday was filled with the joy of her Laughing and singing off key playing stupid card games in the cafeteria bonding over the ridiculous…

I love you like that

I love you like that wind swept hair glowing red cheeks moonbeam smile   You’re the spring in the wood of skies blooming soft petals where creeks run free   You’re the soft morning dew settling on my spine cold and sweet calm and quiet   I love you like that soft waterfall autumn leaves…

To Peregrine

I know you’re scared Afraid of moving forward And too terrified of the unknown But I want you to remember To stop dwelling on the past You no longer belong there I want you to remember When it feels like your anxiety Is swallowing you whole And you’re drowning in your fears That no matter…

I have decided that I love you

I have decided that I love you I have spent too many days wishing you were different— slim waist thick thighs all curves and endless succulence all the things you never were and never would be taunting me I have spent way too long reaching for—   I’ve decide that I love you just like…

Never Mine

When you left that day The snow started falling Softly at first Like the tears flowing Down my face Then hard and fast Like my heart breaking As you slammed the door   I wanted to run after you But I was frozen Not from the cold snow But from the cold stare You gave…

There’s a beast in my belly

There’s a beast in my belly. Some nights he lays dormant On others, I can hear him Screaming To be let out   There’s a beast in my belly, Trying to eat me inside out. He hungers for more, Than I can possibly give.   There’s a beast in my belly Performing the dance of…